Category: Who I am

How A Sandwich Changed My Life

 

I always loved helping my dad in the kitchen. Maybe it was because those moments were always the times he was home.

Saturday mornings were my favorite. He would always make brunch for the whole family.As a young child, my favorite thing was to imitate Daddy and help him. It was his hands that guided mine as I flipped my first pancake. He taught me how to crack eggs into a bowl for him to scramble later. All the while he patiently listened to my never-ending chatter as I set the table for the feast he had made. Together, we experimented and planned. Together, we made every Saturday breakfast a memorable experience.

I remember watching him. One day he began putting together the most diverse concoction I had ever seen. I watched mustard, pickle juice, and cottage cheese go into the bowl of eggs. After adding a couple seasonings and whisking the mixture vigorously, Dad poured everything onto a hot griddle. I watched through the glass lid as the egg mixture rose. I toasted the bagels. Daddy made the bacon and the sausage on large pans in the oven. We put mayonnaise on the bagels together. Then Dad cut the egg mixture into squares.

I watched in awe: this was a new creation and I was involved. Carefully we layered eggs, bacon, and sausage on the bagels. After adding a slice of cheese, the sandwiches were ready. Proudly, I carried them to the table. It was the best breakfast we had ever eaten. Something about the egg concoction mixed with bagels and cheese felt like the best soul food we could wish for.

From then on, we begged every Saturday for “daddy’s sandwiches”. We had brunches and invited people over. Every time we went to the store, we bought bagels. It became our family tradition.

Fast forward a few years. The day was rainy and cold. But not as dark and dreary as my future. My daddy had passed away suddenly a couple nights before. It was Saturday morning again. And I knew there was one thing I had to do.

Slowly I got the bagels out. Crying, I mixed up the eggs. I knew how. I had done it a dozen times before. I put the pans of bacon and sausage in the oven, alone. And alone, I put together sandwiches for each of my siblings.

I sat down, but I couldn’t eat. Not today. These weren’t daddy’s sandwiches. I had made them without him. The breakfast had become a symbol of his protection. Now that he wasn’t here, how could I ever go on?

But then I looked around, and saw my little siblings. They were watching me. I had to go on. There was no option. “For daddy,” I whispered and took a deep breath.

That first bite held all the memories of a life that felt so far away. Right then, I was with my daddy again. His hand folded over mine again, teaching me how to cook. His voice encouraged me, and his eyes smiled down as once more, I ventured into a new path with his help. Right then I realized I could go on. It was then that I knew, whatever happened, I could live again. Through a sandwich, I found that the people you love never leave you.

It’s just up to you to see that.

From Mennonite Kid to Self-Educator

I have always enjoyed learning. Many kids hated school; I loved every minute. However, I never went to a traditional public school. The first six years of my life were spent in a small private school in association with the Mennonite church my father was a pastor of. Continue reading From Mennonite Kid to Self-Educator

Perfection or Constant Growth?

I haven’t read the book Art and Fear, but I have learned a valuable lesson from the book without even opening its cover. There’s an anecdote about an art teacher that holds a valuable lesson for all of life, not just content creation:

“The ceramics teacher announced on opening day that he was dividing the class into two groups. All those on the left side of the studio, he said, would be graded solely on the quantity of work they produced, all those on the right solely on its quality.

His procedure was simple: on the final day of class he would bring in his bathroom scales and weigh the work of the “quantity” group: fifty pound of pots rated an “A”, forty pounds a “B”, and so on. Those being graded on “quality”, however, needed to produce only one pot – albeit a perfect one – to get an “A”.

Well, came grading time and a curious fact emerged: the works of highest quality were all produced by the group being graded for quantity. It seems that while the “quantity” group was busily churning out piles of work – and learning from their mistakes – the “quality” group had sat theorizing about perfection, and in the end had little more to show for their efforts than grandiose theories and a pile of dead clay.” (Source)

We’ve been told all our lives to look at the big picture; there’s nothing wrong with that. But in the process of trying to see the big picture, we have begun obsessing over what it should look like.

Here’s the big deal: spending time worrying about making something perfect takes time away from actually creating value in life. But when you are focused on building and creating, you can’t help but to advance each day. Perfection is an illusion. But constant growth is not. The people who are obsessed with the illusion are the ones who will grow the least.

Maybe, instead of trying to make one perfect big picture, we should focus on each day as a figurative lump of clay ready to be molded. Each project, every idea, each relationship is its own work of art. Instead of sitting around spending time theorizing about what exactly your life’s masterpiece should be, create value on the canvas in front of you.

You’re the artist; go find your canvases.

Photo by Anna Jahn on Unsplash

Networking: my Learning Trend

It’s interesting to watch the trends of information that flow through my life. Sometimes it’s intentional: I’m learning a lot about Mark Twain because of working on a research project with my sister. Other times, the trends are entirely unintentional: all of a sudden a flood of knowledge on a certain subject comes from numerous sources.

I can’t explain the trends. Maybe it’s simply that when my interest is piqued, I start to notice new information that I wouldn’t have seen before. Maybe, subconsciously, I am searching out for the certain knowledge that attracts me. Maybe it’s just God’s divine hand guiding my learning process. Regardless of the cause, I love it. It’s exhilarating to take a step back and watch the process of learning become real in my life.

One of these trends has been the concept of tribe. When I read about tribe in the book The Last Safe Investment, I immediately connected with the idea. Tribe refers to the close group of individuals with whom you share much in common. Tribe is not just a friend group: it is a close circle of people who are committed to growing together.

This started the trend of networking information in my head. It awakened within me the passion to make each connection that I make as strong as possible. Instead of simply thinking of a friend as a friend, I choose to actively grow them and help them succeed. Being intentional with connections makes for strong, healthy friendships and partnerships.

Soon after reading the book I listened to a networking talk by Evan Le at a Praxis conference. Over the next several months, random people reached out to me because of things I wrote or people we both knew, and I realized anew how important it was to strengthen each connection, both business and personal.

This isn’t hard to do. I naturally relate to people, and I have always sought to bring out the best in everyone I am with. However, the difference lies in intentionality. I can’t just wait for people to reach out to me and expect to build a strong network. I have to actively seek to build relationships.

It’s this trend that has led me to pursue direct connection with everyone who chooses to join my podcast mailing list. And I am enjoying it to the full.

What learning trends have you seen in your life? Drop a comment or reach out to me!

It’s All in the Name

I google myself randomly, often. I want to be kept up to date with what comes up when people search for me.

Today, I realized something. I have an edge on the blade of search engine optimization. Nobody else has my name. At least, I haven’t seen any other “Lolita Allgyer” pop up on a Google search. Continue reading It’s All in the Name

Musings On My Life: a Free Verse

What is life, if I live with little impact?

What is freedom, if I do not free another soul?

My life cannot have meaning if I have no legacy.

My life will be in vain if I miss my destiny.

My destiny? to break the chains that bind the broken hearts;

To give the suffering spirits wings to soar the heights of life.

To thrive, and spread the message:

“Life is meant for living!”

So I hold close each heart entrusted to me.

I speak, to fill another soul with hope.

I love, that in my love another may find truth.

I’ll walk with passion, never looking back,

And live one moment at a time:

And as the moments turn to hours,

The hours into years,

Mark my words: my destiny will be completed.

Worst Work Fail?

While working for a dog breeder, I faced one of the biggest possible fails I could have ever imagined.

Princess was a poodle we had just bought. I had been earning her trust, spending time with her every chance I had.

This was the day I decided to let her run loose for the first time. The country property was around 3 acres. But on the north side of those 3 acres ran the county highway. I knew Princess was headstrong, and I didn’t want to risk her running onto the highway. So up until this day, we had taken walks on a leash.

The poodle did just fine, until I called her to come to me. Then I saw the look: that fiery glance of denial, recognizable in every strong-willed character. Princess turned and ran straight for the highway.

“No, Princess!” I screamed in my mind. But my voice managed to remain calm as I softly called her.

She turned, and like a spoiled, haughty heir to the throne, she pranced onward toward her doom.

I watched the scene happen in my mind, before the catastrophe actually struck. I couldn’t run; Princess was a hundred yards ahead of me and determined that she would not be managed. And she ran out onto the road like an idiot.

That very moment, a small car sped down the road into the dog. Princess was gone in an instant. But I stood there, thunderstruck. I couldn’t get the sights and sounds out of my head: that thud of the car hitting her little body, then watching her roll on the road and lie still.

Not only was I emotionally traumatized because of seeing an animal I loved die; I felt awful because I knew she was a $600 dog. Besides, her worth to my boss was much more, as each of her potential pups would sell for at least $400 apiece. I was in charge of a huge loss for this small business.

So I slowly trudged my 13 year old self out to the road with a shovel.  Not going to lie: I leaned on the shovel and cried. Thankfully a friend of our saw me and stopped to help me take poor Princess off the road.

My boss had watched the whole situation through the window. She understood that I had done everything I possibly could. That made the whole situation easier to bear. The battle was in my own mind.

I had faced the worst thing that could happen in the job that I was holding. But through this experience I gained an incredible mindset.

Even the worst possible scenario can’t take you down. Not unless you allow it to control you. I got up the next morning and loved those dogs with all my heart. I worked as hard as I could to make up for the loss. And greater than everything, I determined never to stop growing. Even if it means running into the biggest work fail ever.